What is emotional resilience?

 Emotional resilience is the ability to adapt and overcome various emotional circumstances. It involves bouncing back from trauma and is not just merely avoiding pain.

The key aspects of emotional resilience are adaptability, healthy coping skills, the ability to bounce back from setbacks, good perspective, and emotional awareness and regulation.

There are other important factors as well that, when mastered, strengthen emotional stability, such as optimism, self-care, strong social connections and relationships, perseverance, and acceptance.

Benefits of emotional resilience

• Adapts easily to changes and bounces back efficiently from downfalls

• Avoids falling into negative patterns and habits during challenging times

• Allows one to preserve goals and not lose track of their purpose.

• Shielded from mental health effects such as severe depression.

• Protects from adverse physical effects such as a heart attack or rapid aging.

• Boost interpersonal skills, hence strengthening social and workplace performance.

• Improved overall personal growth.

Steps towards emotional resilience

1. Accept, acknowledge, and validate your feelings.

You cannot solve what you don't know. The first step in being resilient is clearly mapping out what your emotions are, how they present, what triggers them, and how you react to them.

 Once that is done, ensure that

• Take notes on your triggers. When you are exposed to it, you know how to react to the situation at hand appropriately, eliminating irrational responses. (walking away, affirming boundaries, etc.).

• Do not suppress emotions by accepting your feelings. Let it run its course. While this process happens, ensure you allow this process to begin and end safely. This can be facilitated through journaling, talking to someone, or even listening to calm music.

• Practice emotional self-awareness by giving your emotion a name. Don't try to minimize or ignore or rationalize it. You can even be free about it by naming your anger a relatable name, such as ‘Red Joe.’ This subliminal cue allows you to validate your anger and also level it down to an unscary phenomenon. 

This can also allow you to categorize your emotions further depending on how you feel and react to them. Feelings of mild agitation can be ‘ little red joe,’ while bad anger can be ‘big red joe.’

2. Practice intentional awareness and self-care.

Start by practicing positive and realistic self-talk. Anytime you find yourself talking negatively, immediately replace those thoughts with good things. To make this process easier, you can have a time of day when you reflect on your good side and good things. This allows you to have positive thoughts on standby.

 Awareness and care can be achieved through

•  Prioritizing physical health, such as getting adequate rest and sleep, and engaging in satisfying and enjoyable physical activities/hobbies.

• Practice words of affirmation in the morning and evening.

• Take care of your mental health through mental games, managing stress effectively, and avoiding mental burnout.

• Learn how to sit through discomfort without resting badly. Do this by building emotional regulation skills.

3. Cultivate daily wellness habits.

Emotions are a part of us, and that makes them an ongoing phenomenon. This means that activities to build resilience should also be continuous. These activities should be ingrained naturally into one's daily routine. They include

• Developing healthy coping mechanisms. Instead of falling back into bad habits such as drinking or gambling, steadily build healthy coping mechanisms. These could include taking up extracurricular hobbies, learning a new skill, or doing daily physical activity (running/jogging). 

• Practice mindfulness through activities such as meditation. You can set aside just 20 minutes to find a calm space and practice meditation.

• Practice gratitude on a daily basis and find the meaning and purpose of life.

4. Build supportive social connections.

Human beings are social creatures. We draw lessons, support, motivation, and even good feelings from others. Being with others can make building resilience easier, as they can act as an emotional support network. You will receive feedback on where to improve and guidance and support from close friends who want to make sure you succeed in emotional resilience.

 Social interaction also acts as a testing ground. This is where your boundaries will be tested and your emotions triggered. This helps to understand if you're really strengthening mentions. Sometimes, isolation may fool you into thinking that you are growing, while in reality, one social setting might reveal you are far from it.

 Start by:

• Connecting with friends more frequently in order to build healthier and stronger relationships.

• Foster stronger bonds with family members and relatives. Don't miss family gatherings and get-togethers.

• Plan for socialization activities such as game nights, book clubs, and adventure activities (traveling, hiking, etc.).